The most realistic choice!
You have made what is clearly the most realistic choice given the fleeting nature of life and the deep uncertainties we all face in confronting the nature of our existence. Your positive focus on enjoying whatever indefinite time you have to be on Earth shows that you are willing to live your life to the fullest without unnecessarily burdening yourself with ultimately unanswerable questions. Although others may view you as a simple hedonist, you may actually be in touch with your deepest feelings and be directly experiencing a real sense of meaning in your life to an extent that others can only imagine.
If it were theoretically possible for you to be able to overcome whatever obstacles are currently preventing you from most effectively meeting this ideal, so that you could get more enjoyment out of life on a daily basis, would you be willing to do so?